Suddenly Tangible
by Gnash1
Summary: A writer that can't stop writing is faced with a very frustrated, very dangerous character that she's recently put through the wringer. Threads of Delena and plenty of Elijah If you've read anything by me, you'll know that I can't seem to write without including Elijah somewhere in the story... Fangirl crush
1. Chapter 1

Lily sat at the kitchen table with her coffee and her headphones blasting heavy metal music while she tapped away at her laptop to her little heart's content. The apartment was dark, quiet and littered with stuff from one end to the other. Lily had been spending entirely too much time in her own little world to notice. She had managed to make enough room on the table for her coffee and the laptop, but was surrounded by discarded boxes, unopened bills and empty soda cans.

Lily had dark, curled hair and cleaned up quite nice on a good day, but right now was not one of those good days. Sitting at that table she was as much a picture of disarray as the rest of the table and apartment. Her hair was up in a haphazard ponytail, her eyes were bloodshot, she wore cut off blue jeans, flip flops and a t shirt that was two sizes too big. In the nutshell, Lily looked like she had seen better days. But as long as Lily was tapping, she was happy. So she kept right on tapping and the sound rang right along into the silence. That was how Lily liked it.

How long she stayed that way, Lily never really knew. She would lose whole days sitting right there until her hands and back ached. She would stumble into bed, rise a few hours later and start again. She was driven, and didn't know how to turn off the engine.

Her morning was shaping up to be another in a long series of sameness. And then a loud pounding interrupted her rhythm and overcame the metal clashing music in her ears. She didn't have friends in the building, and hadn't buzzed anyone up so who the hell would that be? She turned her music up and kept tapping trying not to lose her last thought. She knew exactly where the scene was headed and didn't want lose track of what she wanted to say.

But the knocking grew louder, damn it. It was actually vibrating the wall and the table. She could feel the vibration of each blow through the floor now. Good Lord, who was at her door, the Hulk? Whoever he was, he wasn't going to like her when she was angry either….

Standing up and pounding across the few steps to the door, Lily prepared to spew a string of curses that would blast her unwanted company away from her doorstep. As the door swung wide though, she never got a chance to use the litany of foul language she had ready.

The man at the door was leaned against the door frame with his arms crossed. He had his head cocked to one side and he was studying her with crystal blue eyes. His eyes were as blue as the place where the sea and the sky met. She knew that line because she had written it many times. His hair was a stark, raven black. He had cheek bones that slashed high, under his eyes and broke up the planes of his face in just the right places. He was clean shaven, except for a shadow around his jawline, a jawline that was as sharp as a knife's edge and tapered to a cleft chin as if God had molded that face with His own hands. He was above average in height, although not intimidatingly tall and he was dressed in black jeans and a black t shirt. He was beautiful. And she knew his face. She knew him, although they had never met.

She noticed then his expression. He was studying her with glittering, frustrated eyes, one eyebrow aloft. His lips were twisted to one side in the picture of a mocking smile.

Then he spoke, and she even recognized his voice. "I take it introductions are unnecessary, Lily."

She swallowed, and then she swallowed some more. "I don't….", The words came out sounding like a squeak. She swallowed and tried again. "I don't understand." Her voice was now husky with confusion.

"You know, I've been thinking the same thing for months." His blue eyes narrowed on her. He was enjoying her discomfort and confusion.

"You see, little girl, everything I touch turns to shit. People I'm trying to help die, the girl I love is passionate about my brother. MY BROTHER of all people? What kind of sick fuck arranges for something like that? And I couldn't keep a friend to save my ass. I have these bursts of unreasonable rage that turn me into a dickhead when even I don't see it coming. I'm totally with you. I don't understand..." His eyes had turned to red, veins lining his face, fangs visible as he spoke. The cool beauty of his face was lost in his fury. "And then I find that I have you, a little home body with an aversion to housework, to thank for all of that?"

Lily did her best to swallow her fear. His voice had gotten louder and louder with every word until he was yelling at her at the top of his voice. The guy needed bourbon, and she had none.

"I didn't mean for any of that to…." Her voice trailed off. She never knew it was actually hurting anyone, but could she really say that as her defense? Not really. He was telling the truth, every last word and it had all been aimed at him.

The fury drained from his face. The red eyes faded and the veins disappeared. It happened much more quickly and quietly than she had ever pictured in her head. She wouldn't have thought that was possible. "Well, Lily. Why don't you invite me in and we'll talk about it." The anger in his eyes had melted away a bit to be replaced by cunning calculation.

But Lily knew the score. She'd been writing it long enough. She backed away from the door, knowing he wouldn't be able to follow. "No, Damon, I think not."

His eyes turned hard again. "Well, then, when is the boyfriend due home? You see, I'm hungry and I happen to know he's a big, strong guy." His fangs returned, his eyes red and face lined. "This should prove interesting at the very least."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Lily moved in close, but still just out of reach of the man at the door. Her own eyes, a muddy green, had narrowed and her expression was a mirror of his. "Alright, I'm only going to say this once." He evidently knew a threat was coming, because his mocking twist of a smile had spread into an almost real smile now. "You know that bloodthirsty nastiness that lives in your head?" Damon nodded. "That's all me, all the time." He actually laughed. "So let me just break it down for ya. If Marcus gets so much as a hangnail and it's your fault, I will arrange for certain tender parts of your anatomy to suddenly shrivel and disappear. Never to be seen or heard from again." She made a "poof" gesture with her hands and grinned. She watched him shudder. She had his attention. She laughed because she was angry with him. Combine that with the fact that she was finding that the evil in her heart now had hands and feet ….and blue eyes. Who wouldn't laugh at finding that they had finally tipped over into madness?

"Do you know how Bonnie always invokes the Goddess before she casts a spell?" He was surprised by the question, but nodded. His lips had twisted again into the mocking smile. Lily hated it when people mocked her. "Well, that's me, Asshat. Think of me as the Goddess. I'm the one that decides if those spells work, along with everything else in your world. So you will respect that or you will go the fuck away."

"I can see where I get my gift for the language." He was grinning again, and she had to laugh, but it was kinder and gentler this time. _He was glad for that because_ _that last laugh of hers was some scary shit. _

_Well, well, well. Not such a good idea to threaten the boyfriend. So much for a harmless little woman he could intimidate._

He held his hands up in a gesture of defeat. "Alright, I give. Boyfriend is safe from me."

Lily was glad that most of the apartments around her were empty as she sank to the floor just inside her door. It was the middle of the day, with very little foot traffic. She gestured to the floor and he sat on the other side of the barrier, also on the floor facing her. Another mirror, this one of her posture looked back at her. She wasn't even sure other people would see Damon sitting there, or if they would just see her sitting in her door on the floor alone, like some nut job.

"Tell me what brings you here, Damon." He had propped both knees up and draped his arms across them.

"I came because I was _so_ angry. I heard your voice in my head when I woke this morning and it didn't stop, so I just followed it until I found this hallway. " He pointed back down the hallway she walked every day.

She waited for him to continue. But he appeared to have run out of steam.

"And now that you're calmer?" She prodded.

One shoulder came up in a helpless shrug. "I must have mom issues, because I want to ask you why you hate me." Interesting. Damon off the page could surprise her.

"I don't hate you, Damon. Not even close." Her voice sounded tender and his gaze swung around to look at her face, surprised. He was confused. So much death and pain had been close to him recently. He could only conclude that whoever was running the show must despise him. He knew everyone else around him sure seemed to.

"I would give you everything right here and now if I could. I've loved you for years, Damon. Even when you're bad, you're still good." She was smiling at him. "But I can't just give it all to you with a nice bow on top. It's just not that simple. One wrong step and it all falls apart. I have to be careful for all or your sakes. I love all of you."

He thought about what she had said for a long moment, studying her face. "Lily, see things from my perspective…." He grasped for an example. "Your Marcus. Do you love your Marcus the way I love Elena?"

Lily swallowed at the example he chose and could already see where he was going. She nodded. "Yes." He drew in a deep breath and said "Well, imagine what it would be like if you couldn't have him, Lily. How would you feel if you had that depth of feeling and he didn't love you back?"

"Damon, who do you think is the model for your love for Elena?" His eyes widened. "You called him my boyfriend, probably something you picked up from my thoughts along your way here. But no, Marcus doesn't love me back." She knew exactly where he was coming from. She was living it too. Lily pointed at a door right across the hall. "He lives right there, and has for the last five years." And she had loved him every day of that five years without fail.

She could offer him one last piece of comfort. "There is one fundamental difference between my Marcus and your Elena, though, Damon." She reached across the barrier and took his hand. "_My Marcus doesn't love_ _me_." She raised a brow, asking him if he got her meaning.

He did immediately and gasped aloud in wonder. "You mean that she….?" Lily smiled and nodded. "She loves you whether she likes it or not. And that's her doing, not mine. I'm just along for the ride with that one." She tapped his chest with one hand, over his heart. "I'm not telling you anything you don't already know, though." He had such a light of relief and joy in his blue eyes though, that she laughed at his joy. Maybe being "goddess" wasn't such a bad idea after all. "But you keep in mind that if you go back there and rub her face in it or mention it, I can see it will push the end result out even further. So keep that close to your heart and find comfort." She moved up on her knees and leaned across the barrier. She kissed his cheek. "I am very proud of what you've become, Damon. You really are a good person. And you already carry my heart around with you, in your pocket. You always did."

He smiled and it reached his eyes this time. Lily knew that was something he needed to hear, that someone was proud of him, cared for him. He really had such a good and tender heart. He just didn't want for anyone to know that. So his secret would be safe with her.

A jangle of keys down the hall made her heart stop. Marcus. He was the only person who came home at this time and she had meant to have the door closed when he got there. Marcus was tall, with dark brown hair brushed to one side and warm brown eyes. He was very tall, very lean and worked at a bank around the corner, forever wearing a suit and tie. He was shy and kind and perfect. And he was eyeing the stranger sitting at her door before meeting her eyes to smile a little.

Damon listened as the man approached and when he saw that the stranger was stopping at the door that Lily had indicated belonged to her Marcus, he grinned to himself. She had brought him comfort, he would do what he could for her as well.

She was still across the barrier, having leaned out and then frozen at the sounds of Marcus' approach. Damon grabbed her by the waist and hauled her into his lap with strong hands while she laughed and squealed in surprise. Then he kissed her for her neighbor's entertainment. But the kiss was a strange sensation because it was actually nice. He had prepared himself for the feeling of kissing his mother, because that's basically what she was, but it didn't feel that way at all. She had created Elena too, so that might explain it.

Marcus had frozen in his doorway when she squealed and laughed. His eyes narrowed in surprise at the pair before he stepped inside and closed the door.

Lily was swatting at Damon trying to force him to break the kiss. He was stronger than her, naturally, and held her in place. He pulled away after a minute, but kept her in his lap. She was a little thing.

"You are a terrible man." She was laughing at him. He laughed too. "My methods are crude, but effective, Lily. Trust me."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

When he had gone, Lily went back to her laptop only to find several pages of prose waiting for her that she didn't remember writing. They went just as she had planned the next few pages should go, so she couldn't complain. But she did notice that the last two paragraphs detailed Damon acting strangely and Stefan pushing him for answers about his behavior. Damon would say only that he had been "communing with the Goddess" and Stefan thought that he had lost his mind. The idea of Damon getting religion was a stretch for his brother to accept.

She had laughed out loud at the "Goddess" reference. Leave it to Damon to be able to make her laugh even when he wasn't there anymore. He always had a gift for making her laugh.

Lily had figured that the day Damon knocked on her door was some sort of breakdown. She had been under a great deal of pressure and grief, so it was understandable. Any shrink would've told her that under her circumstances a psychotic break happened from time to time. The only thing that kept her from checking herself into the closest mental hospital was that Marcus had seen him too.

She had met Marcus in the hallway the next morning where she was headed to the store and he to work. Being a professional writer, she kept strange hours and people all over the building knew it. Marcus had paused to wait for her when she closed and locked her door. It was a kindness because the elevator was as old and slow. He only smiled at her, and usually didn't say very much at all, but today he spoke. "You look different, Lilith." He always called her by her full name for some reason. "New man?" She had showered. That was the difference. But she actually sputtered into laughter at the thought of Marcus believing Damon was her man. _Crude but effective, huh? _

"No, not at all, Marcus. He's just an old friend." Marcus' dark eyes were disbelieving and his brows were high at her words. Old friends didn't usually make out in doorways. But Marcus smiled and shrugged at her, reminding himself it was none of his business.

In a few days' time, Lily had hired a woman to come in three times a week and help her with the housework. She really did need to be able to write, so it only made sense that she get help. Damon's honest appraisal of her and her home had burned a bit. She also made some effort to get out more. So she was genuinely surprised when she came home from dinner with a friend to find Damon sitting on her doorstep.

"Hi, there, handsome. What are you doing here?" He was eyeing her short black dress with an appreciative grin.

"I was thinking about you and I found myself in your hallway again. I knocked. When you were out I decided I would sit down to wait for a few." _He had been waiting for thirty minutes. He could've sat at home, draining bourbon bottles or he could come see her. He had decided on the latter. Damon had a friend, scary chick or not, and he knew how rare friends could be._

She opened the door. "Come on in and have a seat." She invited. But he stopped at the threshold and waited for her to turn around. "Are you sure?" _He asked her because he wanted her to consider the significance of this invitation and be certain she meant it._ She took his hand and drug him across the threshold. "Get your ass in here, already." She grumbled at him with a grin.

"I'm not worried about you hurting me because I know you want the story to continue, Damon. So you have extra motivation to curb your appetite when I'm around."

He was confused. "I must be missing something."

"If I meet with an end, then so do you. The forward motion of your life, all of your lives, stops. There would only be the past left for you. There wouldn't be any dying, of course, just forever caught in a loop."

_He damned well didn't like that at all. His future had Elena in it. In that future she would love him in return, for a damned change. Lily was right, she had nothing at all to fear from him, and he'd probably annihilate anyone who tried to hurt her, just for this reason. _

So they sat on the couch talking. She had even bought him bourbon, in the event that he came back.

He tried very hard to talk her into giving Stefan grief. He was even willing to settle for a couple of bad hair days. Anything would do, as long as Elena was around to witness it. _If you're friends with a goddess, you might as well work the angles, right?_ Lily laughed. Damon loved his brother, but Lily knew even that had limitations where Elena was concerned. Poor guy. In the end she hugged him and promised she would add her own special brand of circumstance aimed at Stefan that he would recognize, just for him. That satisfied him. And then she asked for her own favor.

"Do you think that if I asked, you could bring someone here to me?"

"Bring them here? I don't know. I haven't tried that. But sure, I can give it a go. Who?"

Here was where things got sticky for Lily. It made her heart thrum in her chest at the thought of saying the name, even. Damon heard her heart, and his eyes went wide in surprise. One brow up now, his face alight with curiosity. "Who, Lily?" he pressed.

When she said the name, his mouth fell open. Then he thought about the man across the hall. The way he was dressed. He'd bet the guy spoke with an indistinguishable accent. Damon laughed out loud, long and hard. Then he threw a pillow at her from her couch.

"Oh, I know the score now Lily! I see now what you've been up to. You took your Marcus and dropped him into the midst of us, didn't you? Rotten. You are rotten!" He laughed. "Do you know how many times I got my ass kicked by that guy? Of course you do! You made your Marcus into the biggest, strongest and meanest of us all, and then you just let him loose." He spread his arms wide to illustrate the freedom she had given the other character. He was laughing and shaking his head in wonder. "And you love him best of all."

She was smiling and watching him laugh at her. But she stopped him on the last point. "I told you I love all of you, Damon. Alright, he's a little different. Most of you are reflections of me in some way. He's not. He's a reflection of someone else. But there are no favorites here." He didn't believe her, and she didn't believe herself. They both just smiled. He would do it because she was his friend, and he owed her.

They agreed he would wait for her signal. She didn't say what that was, but said he would know it was her.

It was two days later. Damon was enjoying an early morning glass of protein and pondering his day when Elena walked in. "What brings you here, girlie?" He asked her with a grin.

She smiled a little, still nervous around him after all that had happened, but they had been close once, so she tried. "Oh, Stefan and I are going to spend the day together. Swimming, sunbathing, dinner, shopping, that sort of thing. Is he up yet?"

"How….." Damon drug the word out, all sarcasm. "quaint." _He'd give his fangs to be the one going, but she'd never know that._

He remembered he needed her for something, then. "Listen, Elena. Do you have "the old guy's" cell number?" Elena looked suspicious.

"What are you up to, Damon?"

All innocence, he only shrugged and grinned. "Just a favor for a friend, Elena."

"You don't have any friends, Damon." _Ouch. That was low. A week ago she would've been right. At least as far as Damon knew. If Lily was to be believed she had been a friend to him from the beginning, but he hadn't been aware. Now he was aware, and he was grateful._

"You wound me, little girl." He put a hand over his chest and grinned. _But it really did hurt, smile or no smile_. "I do have a friend. A very good one. This is for her."

A small thin brown brow lifted at his last word. "Her?"

He crossed the room and kissed her forehead before she could stop him. "Don't be jealous, Love. I just need the number, so fork it over. Okay?"

Her brown eyes studied him for a minute. He wore his most practiced innocent look and she pulled out her phone to show him the number he needed.

It was then that Stefan topped the stairs calling a greeting to them both and headed down. Usually so graceful, somehow Stefan's feet tangled under him and he fell all twenty steps landing in a jumbled heap on the polished wooden floor. Damon howled with laughter. He couldn't help it. It was so unexpected.

Elena swatted at him and went to see if Stefan was okay, but he couldn't stop the laughing. When he could catch his breath he said only "Well, I just thank the Goddess you survived that, Stefan." He walked away snorting and shaking his head. _He liked having friends in high places._

But that wasn't the end of Stefan's bad fortune. The rest of their day was marked by equally unusual and terrible things befalling Stefan. A crab got ahold of him at the lake in the worst possible place. A kid on a mini motorcycle ran over his foot in the parking lot at a shopping center. And the waitress at the restaurant they chose spilled three plates of spaghetti over his head and into his lap. Stefan and Elena decided together that somehow Damon was to blame.

They both confronted him. Stefan did it with his fists. But Damon couldn't even defend himself. He was too busy laughing and picking left over spaghetti from under his brother's collar. Tears of laughter were rolling down his cheeks.

"What did you do, Damon?"

"Do? What could I have done, Stefan?" The innocent face he went for lasted about two seconds before he erupted into laughter again. _He thought maybe he loved Lily just a little for her wicked heart._

He took all of these things as his signal. When he was able to stop laughing to himself, in the privacy of his room, he made the call.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

At the knock at the door, Lily froze. She had been making coffee, a large pot, although she didn't know if her guest drank coffee. She didn't remember it ever coming up. She had worked not to dress up. She wore only jeans and a t shirt. She was going for casual.

She went to the door, not sure what to expect. When she swung the door wide Damon was standing there with Elijah. Damon was wearing a very satisfied smirk. He was well and truly pleased with himself. It had taken a lot of fast talking to get Elijah here, and ultimately it had taken full disclosure to make it happen. It was clear to Damon that Elijah still thought he was not firing on all pistons, but he had come anyway, curious.

Elijah was something to behold, as she knew he would be. He had the same dark hair and eyes she had always described with eloquent words. She didn't feel eloquent today. She looked at him with frank appraisal. He was slightly taller than Damon, his shoulders were a bit broader. He wore a grey suit, very expensive, very well cut. He smelled of fresh sage. She loved that fragrance. She always had. His dark hair was rumpled on top, like he had run his hands through it several times on the way there. She knew how Damon wore on his nerves, so she could understand that. His face was a little older than Damon's, a little more lined. She knew that his eyes would crinkle around the corners if he ever smiled at her. She also knew that his brown eyes could turn to a deep boiling cauldron of feeling in close proximity to a certain dark haired young woman that Lily would not name.

Lily stepped out into the hallway and patted Damon's cheek. "You did good, Sweetheart. You know I love you dearly, so I mean this with the best of intentions. Go away." Damon became the picture of offended man for a moment, all indignant bristle. "Now, that's just not nice." He chuckled in spite of himself. He was being dismissed.

"I need to talk freely with him, Damon. He won't do that around you. Hell, he might not do that at all."

She remembered Elijah then and turned, to hold out her hand. "Hi. I'm Lily." He took her hand for a moment, caught off guard by her brashness. He studied her face and appearance for a moment before he dropped the hand again. His dark eyes had hardened.

"I think Damon has lost his mind." Elijah turned, headed back down the hallway he had come. Evidently she didn't meet Elijah's expectations of what a goddess would look like. But there was more to Lily than met the eye.

"How can I prove it's all true, Elijah? What would it take?" He had paused mid stride, still turned away. "Shall I tell you about your first memory?" She had his attention then. He turned back to look at this girl, this child. "That would be a start, Lily."

So she did. She told him all of it, all of his beginning. She described the keep that was his home on the shores of the Baltic Sea. The crude wooden furniture, his mother's loving face, sweetly curled golden blonde hair framing her face as she fed him so tidbit. She had a spot of flour on her cheek and he reached a small hand up to touch the spot. The thing that truly caught his attention, though, was that she told him all of this in his native tongue with a perfect accent. She spoke in an old dialect of ancient Prussian that was dead centuries ago. It was the language he learned at his mother's knee, and it brought tears to his eyes. He hadn't heard anyone speak it in more than a thousand years.

Damon didn't need to know Elijah's business. So she spoke to him in his language. She had learned it before she constructed him, months of the language, to get a grasp of who he would be, the honor and the strength of the people who would spawn him. Lily was nothing if not thorough.

_Damon was amazed and proud to know her. She was speaking to Elijah in some other language, her tone changing to something guttural and brisk. But he could see Elijah understood every word, was moved by what she said. She could easily prove that she was who she said. He had no question about her and what she was capable of. He did find himself wondering why she would chose to live here, though, when she deserved so much more that this apartment building could offer. _

Seeing the glitter around Elijah's eyes, Lily turned back to Damon to distract him. She stepped between the two, and drew Damon's attention to herself allowing Elijah a moment to gather himself. "Now, go have coffee, or a drink or whatever. Please." She kissed his lips lightly and tried again to send him on his way.

"How do I know he won't hurt you?"

She turned to look at Elijah because Damon had a point. She spoke frankly. "Everything you have seen, all that you have been, lost, needed and done without has been my fault, Elijah. The family that you've lost, the madness, the pain, all of it was my doing. Is that enough for you to want to kill me?" If that didn't do it, nothing would.

He considered carefully for a moment. Then he spoke "Did you mean to cause such pain? Was it an effort to break me?" His voice was strangled.

She responded the same way she had when Damon was hurting. She moved in close and spoke tenderly. She put a hand on either side of his face, as a mother would a beloved child. "Never." She was eye to eye with him then. "I honestly didn't know that what I wrote was actually affecting anyone until Damon came knocking on my door trying to kill me. That was a little more than a week ago for me."

"I never meant to hurt any of you; especially not you. You've hurt more than anyone. I'm so sorry, Elijah." She could only hope he could see the sincerity in her eyes. She hoped that the love she felt for him was reflected there.

"I will not hurt you, Lily." Eye to eye, he said it. He was studying her as closely as she was studying him. She knew he wouldn't break his word.

"You go away. Give us an hour. " She was speaking again to Damon. "Please come in, Elijah."

Damon walked away grumbling something about having to _earn_ his invitation into her home. Elijah got one on a damned silver platter. He was a jealous snot. The man was worse than a six year old.

Lily settled on a chair and suggested Elijah sit on the couch.

He leaned back, his dark eyes studying her in the dim light. "Lily seems a strange name for a goddess."

She grinned. "Actually, my first name is Lilith."

"Ah, that is much better. That is the first part of this that makes some sense. That name holds volumes of implications about power and ancient connections with demons. Very appropriate. May I call you Lilith, then?" Elijah figured it was not every day that someone met their maker. He wanted to have her name right, at least. She had thoroughly rattled him in the hall. There was no doubt about what she was. He just didn't understand the "how" of it all.

She smiled because that's exactly what Marcus insisted on calling her. She nodded and he smiled back. A rare sight, she knew.

"I asked that you come here, Elijah because I'm attempting to make things right. Everyone else I have a sure understanding of what it would take to do that. With you, I'm at a loss." He had raised a brow at her words, confused.

"If you could have anything, what would it be, Elijah?" Anything covered a lot of ground, so she decided to be more specific. "Do you want to be human? Have your family back? Never even know that vampires existed? Do you want to die and find paradise? Find your family there, waiting for you? There are a few things I can't do, but all of these things I can do." She was talking fast and he was wondering at the power she wielded in her small hands.

He turned and looked at a darkened corner for a moment, thinking, before he looked back at her. It was not every day that a goddess offered you anything.

"You know what I want." He said the words simply, frankly and met her eyes.

Elena.

Lily knew all about that too. She shook her head, sadly. "I wish that I could give that to you, Elijah. But that particular heart has already been given. She did that herself and I can't fight it without destroying her." She knew he would never want that. She could be honest with him, though. "She loves Dipshit out there." She pointed toward the door and smiled.

Elijah laughed. That was even rarer than the smiles.

"So what else?" She leaned forward onto her knees, probing for more information. "Is it loneliness that troubles you more than anything?"

He swung his gaze rapidly away, back to the darkened corner. _Ah, a hit._

"What if I could offer you someone who would love you without condition? Someone you could love too, that would not care where you had been, all that you have done, and just loved you?" She chewed on her inner lip, thinking fast. Already she was drawing together the elements of a character that would fit that bill. She could do this stuff in her sleep. "I can't believe I actually had to ask. Now that you're here, it seems so simple. Isn't that what everyone really wants? To be loved for themselves?"

"Why would you do that for me, Lilith?"

"Because I need for you to be at peace, Elijah." She moved to the couch beside him. Earnest appeal was in every line of her body and face. "I've hurt you more than anyone and I want for that part of your life to be done. I can do that, I just needed to know what would make you happy."

"You could have done that without this meeting though. So why am I here, really?" He took her hand. He could see there was more here than just wanting for everyone to be happy. There was an urgency in her manner that he did not understand.

"Because I'm running out of time, Elijah, and I needed to know exactly what you need from me. I don't have time to flounder around looking for just the right thing that will bring you peace." Lily spoke the words swiftly because they made her chest ache. _Out of time. God, how that hurt_.

"How can that be, Lilith? How does a goddess run out of time?"

"It's complicated, Elijah. And just like you, there are some things I just don't share. I'm sorry." He nodded his understanding.

"Forgive me, someday for what I put you through. Everyone else is based on bits and pieces, parts of me. You were different. You were based on the man that I loved. I know you've always felt out of step with everything and everyone else around you. That's why. And I'm so sorry. I will make it right, Elijah. I swear it." She was crying now, great tears running down her face. So much for a regal goddess image. She wanted to be embarrassed, but when he pulled her into his arms and held her there while she cried, she decided regal was overrated.

She cried a little harder as she heard him say that there was nothing to forgive. He assured her that she had given him far more than she had ever taken away.

She swallowed took a deep breath and tried to gather herself. "Damon doesn't know any of this, so don't repeat it. You know how impulsive he is. I worry he would do something stupid if he knew time was short."

Elijah nodded. Lilith was a wise girl. Damon could be unpredictable. He corrected himself. She was not a girl, she was a goddess; a goddess that was out of time. It seemed like a contradiction.

There was a light knock at the door then and she welcomed Damon into her home again. It had been exactly one hour. He took in her wet face and spiky lashes and confronted Elijah immediately. "What the hell did you do?"

Lily put a hand on his arm. "He didn't do anything, Damon. It was all me. He's been a gentleman, as always. So hush."


	5. Chapter 5

_Damon could see changes all around him. It might be his perspective that had changed since he had come to know Lily, he wasn't sure. But things were rapidly adjusting if he stopped to look around._

_ The previous night before had held the biggest change for him recently. Ric had knocked on his door. His best friend, Ric, that had died in his arms a couple of months ago was up and walking around. He was a vampire, but he was up and alive again. Ric told a story about being "somewhere else" where there were other ghosts and spirits roaming around, and then light had broken in darkness. A small woman with dark hair told him she had broken the spell that had cost him his life and she was sending him back. _

_ Lily. And she had given him his best friend back. He was full of more being grateful for friends in high places._

_ Another change was that Stefan and Elena had decided that after all they had been through they couldn't just pretend none of it had happened. Stefan was finding consolation in the arms of Caroline, of all people. Caroline? Really? But for some reason it seemed to work. Caroline had always privately reminded Damon of Lexi, so it did make sense in a twisted sort of way. Stefan had always loved Lexi._

_ Elena hadn't been around for a few days, and Damon was fine with that. She had adjusting of her own to do. _

_ On impulse, Damon took Ric to see Lily._

_ He knocked several times and couldn't get her to open the door. He could hear her, smell her behind the door, but she didn't speak and didn't answer. After a minute or two of this, he lost his patience and forced the lock, stepping in with Ric still standing in the hallway. Ric still lacked an invitation._

_ He found Lily on the bathroom floor, heaving into the toilet. She was thinner. How was it possible for her to be thinner? She was also sweating and shivering. Clearly she was very ill. Did goddesses get ill?_

When she saw him, Lily shuddered in shame. She reached up and pulled a towel down and around her face. "You shouldn't be here, Damon. I gave you everything you need. You'll be happy now. Please go away." She retched again.

He decided to ignore her insistence that he leave. Something was very wrong here. "What's wrong with you, Lily? Why are you so sick?" She heaved again.

"It's the chemo." Another eruption into the toilet happened as she shivered and sweat on the floor. "They tell me it might save me, but I know better. My kidneys are shutting down."

She had calmed and he took a rag to her face, wiping away all of it. His chest ached at the picture she made there on the floor, miserable and in pain.

Then he remembered Ric. "I brought someone to see you. Can he come in?"

She was dying anyway, so it didn't matter one way or the other to her. She yelled from the bathroom with what strength she had left and said "Please come in." She didn't know who it was, but she trusted Damon.

Ric found them on the floor together. He recognized the woman from behind the darkness. But she was smaller, weaker now. He gasped aloud. Damon was sitting with his arms wrapped around the woman who had given him life again. How was that possible?

"Ric, this is my friend Lily."

The two of the talked about her as if she wasn't even there, damned men. She was witnessing a bromance scene right here, next to her toilet and her laptop was nowhere in sight for her to make notes.

"What the hell, man?" Ric was confused. "That's the woman that came after me."

"Yeah, she kinda made all of us."

"_Made_ us?"

"Yeah, don't ask. It's complicated. But she's the one that sent you back. For me evidently. She and I have been friends and she probably figured if she was dying, I would need you."

"Please. All I could offer is company for the drinking." Ric's usual self- deprecating attitude lasted even after vampirism. Amazing.

Lily put in here because she couldn't help herself. "That's exactly what I had in mind."

She started to shiver again. Definitely kidney failure. God, the pain was unbearable and her morphine wasn't working. She looked up at Ric, the vampire, looking back at her and thought maybe she was wrong and the morphine _was_ working.

Lily laughed a little, addressing Ric. "You know, you ended up much hotter than I meant for you to be." Ric grinned. "Please take him away, Ric, so he'll just let me die. There's no magic here. No heroes. He won't listen, but you will. Please." She shivered through every word as she appealed to Ric's common sense. "If he tries to change me, I'll just die. If he tries to bite me, I'll just bleed to death. If he stays I'll die. If he leaves, I'll die. My story ends the same no matter which option you choose, Damon. " She laid her hand on his, trying to make him understand. He had wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into his lap again as she spoke. She was facing away from him, with her head tucked under his. All she could see of him was his hands and arms, steel bands around her.

"What about family, Lily?" Ric was trying to find a way to help her.

She shook her head. "Not really, not since I was two. I was raised in foster care."

"Friends?"

She shook for a minute so hard she couldn't speak, her strength fell away. She closed her eyes as she spoke, tears leaked out around her closed eyes. "I don't have friends, Ric. Friends become people with expectations."

Damon's arms tightened around her. He had pulled her more tightly against his chest at her words.

"God, she sounds just like you."

"See what I mean, man?" Damon's voice was thick.

"I've done what I promised, Damon. I love you, my friend. I always did. Now it's time to let me go." She was crying. "I don't want for anyone to see me like this, please." The shivering started again, her fever was rising. It wouldn't be long now. She wasn't going to call for an ambulance as the instructions had said she should. She would stay here, and it would be done. No more breast cancer. No more tests, scans or medication anymore. No more long talks with a regretful physician telling her that it had spread to her bones. No more lost time, no more hurting, no more pain. She was done.

"The hell you are." Damon sounded angry.

She had been speaking out loud. Oooops. But she was being lifted, tucked against his chest. He had an arm under her legs, one behind her shoulders and he was taking her somewhere.

She wanted to ask him what the hell he thought he was doing, but she couldn't find her voice anymore. When she opened her eyes, she found they were headed down the hallway Damon always came from. Ric was behind them, she met his eyes in confusion, but he only shrugged.

_Damon was not going to let her die. If magic didn't work here, then they would take her back to his place where magic did work. He'd be force feeding her a blood bag before sunset, damn it._

_ They came to the veil. He didn't really know what it was, but it was some sort of cobweb like substance he always passed when he came to see her in this hallway. He thought of it as a veil, and he had passed through coming or going many times in the last few weeks. This time, as he reached the other side of the veil, the one where Mystic Falls was the reality, Lily just completely disappeared. One minute she was there, solid, looking back at him mutely and the next she just misted away in his arms. She. Was. Just. Gone. And he had no idea how or why. He didn't even know if he should be mourning the loss of a friend or not._


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Damon had harassed Bonnie for nearly a week before she would even see him. It took two more days to convince her to attempt to cast a spell for him. The fact that he didn't give a damn what spell she chose had really thrown her. When she asked him what the point of all of it was then, he said only "Think of it as you helping me make a phone call."

She had heard that Damon had lost his mind recently. She was beginning to see that it was true.

So, because she was damned if she would be inviting Damon into her home, she met Damon and Elena in her back yard. The garden there was lovely and just about over run with vervain. Bonnie had insisted Elena be present because she didn't trust Damon at all, and probably never would. He still didn't care, he just wanted her to get started already.

Bonnie cast the circle and called each of the elements as she always did, placing each representation in a small bowl at her feet. Bonnie then invoked the goddess, with her eyes shut, just as always.

But this time, the ground trembled under her feet. Her eyes shot open, and she saw Damon smiling. The wind kicked up, tossing her hair, the leaves, her clothes with enough strength to make her think of tornadoes and straight line winds. The small candle she had used to represent fire, rather than being blown out in the sudden gale that had churned up, burned higher and hotter, to a flame so hot it burned blue. Rain fell, a drenching downpour, from a cloudless sky for the span of two heartbeats. Then Bonnie saw her. She was willow thin and wore a silver gown, the color of starlight. Her eyes were silver and gold, churning with the colors of the stars and lightning in the irises. She wore long, black gently curling hair that swept up around her, moving with her and her clothing almost as a shawl would move. She was beautiful. She was light and dark, the goddess of balance and justice, nature itself, looking back at Bonnie with tenderness in her eyes.

"You have done well, Bonnie." Her voice sounded like a thousand waterfalls, a throbbing, musical sound. The goddess approached and Bonnie felt heat and electricity in the air moving closer. She had to force herself not to run. When she shifted her gaze again to those eyes, though, she was calm again. The goddess touched her face with one hand, and Bonnie felt the jolt of power ripple across her skin and settle into her chest. She didn't know what it meant, and had no record of anyone ever meeting the goddess before in all of her texts. She had no point of reference for this.

The goddess smiled. "A gift for you, Bonnie. Because I am pleased that you called me here."

Then the goddess turned away, turning to the other two. But she only got a step before Damon was moving in close and lightning fast to wrap his arms around her small waist. Bonnie gasped, certain that he was toast at last, but the goddess laughed, returning the embrace.

"You did good." She said to him, where they could all hear. "You understood, even when I didn't. I'm sorry I had to go, it all happened very fast. I know you've been trying to reach me. The "phone call" was a stroke of genius." She patted his cheek and he laughed, lifting her high into the air and spinning in joy. The wind whipped up around them, along with her gown.

"Look at you, Lily. You are beautiful." He was laughing, but his eyes leaked too.

"A mirror image, Damon. You know that. You are the best parts of me." Damon saw Lily's eyes cut to Elena.

"You should hurry, little girl, or I might be tempted to claim him for my own." He had sat her back down on the ground. She surprised him by taking hands just as strong as his and pulling him down into a kiss that whipped the wind up again, the flame dancing higher, the ground trembling under all of their feet. When she backed away, she patted his cheek. "Crude but effective, Damon, remember?" She smiled and her eyes, the silver and gold, swirled a little faster in her mischief.

For his ears only, she said "Now I know the path again. Just say my name and I will hear you."

She dropped one last, quick kiss on his lips and her musical voice filled the air with "Thank you, Love." for all to hear and then she was gone.

And he had two sets of eyes taking him in with wonder. He grinned, shrugged and said only. "I've been busy." He turned to Elena for a parting shot. "I told you I had a good friend."

The goddess was Damon's friend. Both Bonnie and Elena were shaking their heads at one another.

Lily was playing. She'd been reading about it for years, but she wanted to try it for herself. She had time, all the time in the world now, and so she had gone to the lake and was walking across the water. It was amazing and exciting and just what she had always imagined it would be.

Her words to Damon had created the character she now inhabited. She had never intended to give the goddess a corporeal body, but somehow that was the result. She had been exploring since her arrival and lost track of time. She knew that if she approached the cobweb veil between the two worlds she grew weak again. She knew if she passed over it, she would die. So she stayed here, and would have to be satisfied with that. She was so grateful to Damon for what he had done, even though he hadn't known what would happen. Hell, neither of them had.

But she was here, strong, healthy, and had all of this power for the first time in her life. She held her hands out and watched the power surge around them. She could even stop it, slow it. All of the elements, nature itself here was hers to balance and command. These people, she could hear all of them. Prayers lifted, not always just to her, but all prayers, would whisper in her ears if she focused. It was for this reason that she was unable to pinpoint how to locate Damon. There had been too many voices in her head.

The dwelling place that this character had was a temple of all places. She didn't know exactly how she got there; she just thought "home" and would find herself standing at the wide stone doors of a temple. Inside was a comfortable and opulent resting place that she loved.

All these things were in her mind as she followed the wind and waves, taking one step after another to reach the lakeside.

She was still out on the water, light surrounding her, when she heard a voice from the shadows at the lake's edge that she recognized instantly. "Lilith, this is more what I was expecting when Damon told me that the goddess wanted to see me."

She laughed, and it came out as the sound of tinkling bells. She would never get used to that.

"Well, I'm glad I've come to live up to your expectations, Elijah." He stepped out of the shadows and she saw appreciation in his gaze at the changes in her.

He stopped and seemed to swallow for a minute, lost for words, maybe? Then he said "You look wonderful, Lilith."

She smiled at him. "I feel wonderful, Elijah."

"I take it that your issue of time is resolved?"

"It is." She sat on a rock, close to the edge of the water. He came and settled beside her.

"Can I ask now what happened?" He assumed nothing. How sweet.

"Yes. I can talk about it now." She crossed her legs and settled down. "My birth mother shared only one thing with me after she abandoned me at two years old. It was breast cancer. I found that she died with it. The same year she died, I was also diagnosed. I was twenty four." She shrugged.

"I fought for my life, but I also sank into another world to distract myself from the pain and the fear." She looked around for a moment. "This world." She flung a hand out thinking only to indicate all of what surrounded them, but lighting struck far off at her gesture. _Oooops_. She put her hand back down again.

"I was already a writer, articles, technical stuff. But this was different. My first manuscript was snapped up while I was still getting radiation treatments. My books became bestsellers and were read and critiqued far and wide. In the meantime, I just tried not to die."

"After a year of aggressive treatment, I was declared cancer free." She shrugged. "But it didn't last. Thinking I was home free, I spent the next three and a half years working on all of this, all of you, building a world that captivated people. But I was the captive. I couldn't stop writing. It drove me and I grew weak again."

"At my last check up, six months ago, the scan came back with bad results. It was back, and it was in my bones. In my world, there's no cure for that, Elijah."

"So, knowing that I wanted to draw the story to a pleasant conclusion for everyone, I wrote like a mad woman, intending to set it all straight. And then Damon knocked on my door mad as hell." She smiled at the memory. "He told me I was a sick fuck. He had no idea." She laughed.

"So you have hurt just as much as the rest of us." Elijah easily summarized what she was saying.

"Not as much, or for as long as you did, Elijah." She shrugged, looking away, up at the stars. "That was why I was so worried about you. I was also afraid I wouldn't have the time to get what you needed ready before my illness overtook me."

"But you did get it done, did you not?" He was studying her profile with dark eyes. She turned at his words to look back at him. She saw then something she wouldn't have imagined in a million years. The swirling cauldron of feeling was there, looking back at her from behind his eyes as he studied her. _Oh my._


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

This wasn't at all how things were supposed to go. That was all Lily could think. The look in Elijah's eyes made her heart stutter in her chest, but he wasn't supposed to be hers, or be looking at her like that. Evidently he didn't hear her heart as all vampires heard human hearts, thankfully. That would be embarrassing.

Lily happened to know that a lovely and very sweet little witch named Leah was going to be wandering into town looking for Bonnie. She had fiery red hair, mossy green eyes and would love Elijah with everything she had. And he would love her too, if his eyes weren't focused on a goddess that wasn't supposed to be there. She was about to ruin everything for him again. _How did she keep hurting him, without even trying? Damn it. _

There was a jangle in her chest, an alarm. Her attention turned inward and she heard Damon's voice. It wasn't urgent, but it gave her an excuse to gather her thoughts, so she took it with both hands.

"Something's come up. I'm going to have to go." She went up on one knee and leaned over, intending to kiss Elijah on the cheek. He intervened. As she moved in close, his hand shot out and pulled her to him, covering her mouth with his for the first time.

Lily had never felt anything like this before. The contact with him buzzed across her senses, her breathing stopped, her heart stopped. She pushed away with just a breath between then and gasped in surprise, pulling in a quick breath before he started a renewed assault. The gentleness in his hands, in his mouth as it took hers again was a surprise in itself. How could someone with so much strength also be so gentle? His hands wove into her hair as he pulled her closer to him for a moment. She was kissing him back, her own heart on her sleeve. Her hands, of their own accord, hand moved up to his face, running across his jawline, his cheekbones, trying to memorize him. No, this wasn't supposed to be happening, but now that it was, he was all she had known he would be.

She didn't notice that the ground was rumbling under them, or that lightning had just split a tree five hundred yards away. When she did, she would be embarrassed. She was going to have to get a handle on her emotions or she would injure people.

They were both breathing hard now. Lily pulled away just a little, regret in her eyes. "I have to go. I'll find you." She kissed him once more and then melted away in his arms as she had with Damon on her first day in Mystic falls.

_Elijah looked at his empty hands and wanted to roar in frustration. He had been able to think of little but her since the hallway outside her apartment. Her face, her scent, the sound of her voice speaking in his language kept invading everything he tried to do. The expression in her eyes when she had told him she never intended to hurt him, especially him. She had told him she modeled him after the man she loved. Considering that point for long made him angry. He had no wish to be second, not in this of all things._

Damon and Ric were drinking in the den. Damon had called her, testing out the connection she said was established. There was no other purpose to his call, except to settle his concerns about being able to reach her. He wouldn't have done it at all if he had been sober.

When Lily just appeared, no fanfare at all, in his den he breathed a sigh of relief. He took in her appearance with a grin.

"Lily, sweetheart, I don't know who you've been doing, but you look like you've just come from being drug behind a woodpile by someone with evil intentions." Her eyes were brighter than before, her cheeks flushed. Her hair was mussed and her dress twisted a little.

Ric covered his grin with one hand, swallowed and took a big drink of his vodka.

Lily smiled sweetly to Damon and said only "Dick."

It was rude and brash and just what Damon needed her to say. He had worried she would change, that they would change because she was new and different. Damon hooted with laughter.

Ric struggled not to spew his big swallow of vodka out his nose. When he could breathe, he was snorting with laughter. Finally he said "Dude, I think she officially has your number."

Lily laughed. She knew all of his tricks, because they were her own, but she wouldn't say any of that. "This is why we are such good friends, in such a short time, Ric. I know all his angles, and I love him anyway." She smiled wide. "Do you think one of you could get me a drink? I could really use one." She still had the tingle on her lips. She ran her finger over them.

Ric got up for the drink and Damon took in her gesture. "You _have_ been busy, haven't you?"

She laughed, realizing what she had been doing. "Oh, hush."

When Ric pressed the glass into her hand, she downed it like a pro and both men roared with laughter. They hadn't ever seen a woman drink, evidently. She rolled her eyes at them. It had been months without alcohol for her because of her meds. Bourbon and morphine didn't mix. Ultimately she just shrugged and grinned asking with her eyes if it was alright to get another. Damon grinned and she helped herself. She was thinking she needed to add a bar to her home.

Thinking the word home, she was standing at the doors again. Damn it.

She backed up and reappeared in Damon's living room, shrugging. Both men were staring at her in wonder. She was well and truly embarrassed. "I'm still getting used to this power. A single stray thought and I'm off. Sorry guys."

"Where did you go?"

"I was thinking about changes I would like to make to the place I live now and suddenly I was at the door again."

Damon, being Damon, he couldn't keep his mouth shut. "So, who have you been kissing, Lily?"

The subject change startled her. She opened her mouth, and then closed it again. Like a fish. Yes, exactly like a fish.

"A lady doesn't kiss and tell, Damon."

"Sweetie the first time we met you called me an asshat. A lady you're not…sorry."

Ric roared with laughter. He just kept saying "asshat" over and over under his breath and laughing. Time to cut the vampire off the vodka….

"Well then, this goddess doesn't kiss and tell, Damon." She settled back on the couch beside him. "Speaking of, did my little warning have any effect at all on your girl?"

Damon grinned. "She hasn't been by, but she's called every night this week. I think she's trying to make sure I'm still here and not carted off to a goddess' temple as some sort of sex slave."

"Now THERE'S an idea…." Lily leered and both of the guys laughed.


	8. Chapter 8

_Elijah had never met anyone or anything that he could not track. There was nothing and no one he could not locate eventually. It was his gift. But Lilith, like starlight, was intangible. He could find no scent, no trace that would tell him where she was or how he could find her. The sensation of helplessness that went with this discovery was new and unpleasant. He missed her. The sound of her voice, the brash way she expressed herself that made him smile without fail, these were the things he missed. He had spent a great deal of time arguing with himself about visiting her again through that cobweb veil between their worlds after their initial meeting. Common sense always managed to win out. They had been, quite literally, from different worlds. But that wasn't true anymore. _

_He refused to think about how he had grabbed her like a foolish teenager in the woods. He had seen one too many of those meaningless kisses between her and Damon and he wanted no part of that. It would be all or nothing with him, damn it. _

_He would rather forget it had happened at all, except for her response. That he would never forget. For a brief moment, she had been right there with him, whipping up the wind and the passion to match his own. And then she was gone. _

_ He thought about all she had promised him that day in her little apartment. Someone who would care nothing for where he had been or what he had done. Someone who would love him and that he could love. Those were her words. And here she was, suddenly part of his world, permanently it would seem, so why did she run? He knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she did not fear him._

Lily was standing behind him pondering whether she should interrupt his thoughts. He was drinking coffee, espresso from the looks of it and looking up at the stars stopping to take a sip here or there. Whatever he was thinking about wasn't making him very happy. He looked, to her, to be pondering some problem. She had nearly decided to leave him alone when two rough hands grabbed her by the shoulders forcing her forward.

"Brother, I found this skulking in the shadows just now. Is this yours?" Klaus, in all his arrogant glory interrupted his thoughts, dragging Lilith by one arm.

"Listen you piece of shit, don't you dare touch me." Lilith pulled her arm away from him and he seemed surprised when she was just as strong as he was.

_A gift from Lilith seemed to be his brother up and about again. Some gift. He loved his brother, but Klaus was also difficult to deal with on his best days. Elijah shot to his feet at the sound of her voice. Oh no. _

To cover his confusion at her apparent strength and lack of fear, Klaus' mouth went into overdrive. Elijah cringed when he said "Well, Brother. Are we keeping company with guttersnipe now?"

_Elijah watched Lilith's face change to one lacking all expression, the wind whipped her hair just a bit, her silver and gold eyes whirled a little faster as a single brow lifted. This was not going to go well._

"Lilith, wait." Was all Elijah had time to say before his brother was sporting a pained expression and standing on his the tips of his toes for some reason. His breathing had stopped and his face was turning red.

Klaus couldn't move. It appeared he was afraid to move. Lily stepped close to whisper in his ear, but Elijah heard her all the same. "I don't like you, Niklaus. I never did. You still draw breath because he loves you. You are a foil. Your soul purpose was to make the point that this is what happens when someone with power lets it corrupt them. He, on the other hand is the exact opposite." She gritted her teeth and Klaus gasped out loud. "He is worth ten of you. And you treat him like some sort of concierge around solely to do your bidding." Over and over she had done what she could to separate them in the writing for this reason, but they always ended up together again. This is how she knew that Elijah loved his brother. Just as Elena's love for Damon was beyond her control, so was this. Right now she had enough pressure on Klaus' testicles to remove them if he was a human. And here she did have control. She had closed her power around them like a fist. She would remove them altogether if he so much as looked at her wrong. Still she hadn't actually touched him.

"I know that you will live forever, Klaus. But much more pressure and you'll be walking around without these, singing soprano. And you're regenerative powers just failed, as of ….now." She was smiling and speaking so very sweetly. She tapped her wrist where there was not a watch.

She turned to walk away, Klaus still on tip toe. Elijah was speechless. She did not turn to him, but spoke as she retreated. "I came looking for you, Elijah. Just say my name and I'll hear. You just make sure that jackass boy isn't around when you do it, or I won't be as sweet as I was just now." As she walked away he heard her say "Guttersnipe my ass."

When she was out of sight, Klaus came down with a gasping moan onto his knees on the deck. "My God, Elijah, what the hell was that?"

"You just pissed off a goddess, Niklaus. You might not want to invoke any others."

_Elijah waited until much later before he returned to the deck, looked up into the sky and said Lilith's name aloud. _

_ In a heartbeat she was standing behind him. Her gown was copper colored now, long and flowing, hugging her lovingly in the wind. _

_ "I apologize for what my brother said to you." Elijah wanted to get that out before she got angry again and disappeared._

_ "Not your fault, Elijah. What he does has never been your fault." She smiled at him. He watched the silver and gold swirl in her eyes for a minute, lost in the pattern. She was so beautiful. He swallowed._

_ "I looked for you." He was always one for honesty._

_ "I got caught up in some things. I didn't know. I'm sorry. That was why I established this connection. I can't seem to read you like I do everyone else. I can't tell what you're thinking at all."_

_ "Would you like to know what I am thinking, then?" He took a single step toward her as he spoke._

_ "Would you just tell me, if I asked?" She was smiling. She didn't believe it._

_ "I would." It was a dare. He was daring her to ask him._

_ "Then what are you thinking, Elijah?" She stepped closer and they were a breath apart then._

_ "I am thinking you are the most wild and beautiful thing I have ever seen. I think that it is refreshing not to worry if someone is afraid of me and that I am in awe of you." He reached out and ran a single hand down the sleeve. "I also think I should have sold tickets for what you did to Klaus."_

Lily laughed. Elijah had made a joke.

_ He was smiling down at her then and she took the final step into his arms. "There's something you should know."_

_ He froze, expecting the worst. It was an old habit of his._

_ "I didn't write this. Me for you. I never planned any of this. I have someone else entirely for you all planned." Her eyes had darkened a bit and the swirling was so fast now that he could not discern a single color. _

_ What she said surprised him. He had thought he was feeling the way he did because she wanted it. Now, to find that was not true at all was alarming for a moment, and then freeing._

_ "Is this not something that you want, then?" He would always bring things to a bottom line. _

_ "Not at all. I would want this very much, but I don't see where it goes, Elijah. I don't know how this ends. I can look around at everyone else and see where they're going, what waits for them. I can adjust it, change it. This is different. It's a blind spot for me, if you will." Her voice was a thread of a whisper. "The point is that the girl I had written for you would be your happily ever after. I wasn't ever supposed to be here. So it's possible that this won't be a happy ending." She hung her head. "I've hurt you enough already."_

_ He put a finger under her chin and tipped her face up. "You will stop that, now." He was shaking his head, his eyes reproachful. "No more blame. And I think that this being something you did not plan is all the better. We are both, then, on common ground. Uncertain. As for this other person, send her away, keep her here for someone else, whatever you choose. But I want to explore this, if you would also like to explore it." He did not wait for her answer. Very tentatively he pressed his lips to hers. He had moved slowly to give her time to move away if she chose. But she did not choose to move away. She stepped into the kiss, wrapping her arms around him._

_ She was sweetness and light to him. As she did all things, she kissed wholeheartedly. Her hands ran under his jacket, across the smoothness of his silk shirt and he shuddered at the sensation, and she had not even touched bare skin yet. Her tongue met his in a dance, a parody of what they both wanted. She sighed against him and he thought it was the most beautiful sound he had heard in lifetimes. For him, all of this was for him._

_ She leaned away for a moment and took a deep breath before she smiled and spoke. "I wonder how Ric feels about redheads."_

_ He grinned. A redhead. She wanted him to have a redhead, when she had all of these lovely raven black curls? His hand went into her hair as he said "He'll like them if you tell him to."_


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Good lord, she loved him. It had struck her in the chest like a blow. She had left Elijah smiling and frustrated the night before when the thought occurred to her as he kissed her.

Something about the whole thing felt strange. She had created him, breathed life into him with her words. She had poured everything into him, all of what she respected and loved into a single man. Then she made him invincible so that death would never touch him. Somehow it felt like taking advantage, but she couldn't explain even to herself why she felt that way. When she did all of this, she had never once dreamed that she would find herself in his arms one day. Strange. It was all very strange. When she considered all that had happened to her recently, this was not the top item on her list of strangeness. She wasn't sure it would make the top ten. But it troubled her all the same.

It frightened her, feeling this way. He had said that they were both "uncertain" with this new thing between them. Caution learned long ago and a gift for guarding her heart both reared their ugly heads, crippling her with fear and making her run.

She was sitting at the lakeside again. Lily was discovering that intense emotions resulted in bursts of power from her. When she thought about it, nature itself was unpredictable in her world. So it would make sense that nature here would be guided by the nature and tendencies of a woman that could be volatile one moment, tender the next. She had come to the lake because she hoped there would be no one she could hurt. Already a gale had blown up and a thunderstorm was gathering over her head as she thought about all that had happened and wondered where it would go.

A voice from behind the trees spoke into the gusting wind she had churned up. "You are upset, Lilith." Finally, Elijah had found a way to track her. Wherever a storm blew up, there she was in the midst of it.

She swung around, surprised and smiled for him. "No, I'm fine. I was just thinking. That's all." She patted the rock beside her and motioned that he could join her if he wanted.

As he sat, Elijah said "You are missing your man."

He meant Marcus. She swallowed hard at his words in genuine surprise. She hadn't thought of Marcus since she had arrived, not a single time. That in itself spoke of her fickle heart and made her feel ashamed. Elijah seemed to be gauging her reaction to his comment and didn't like what he saw at all. He swung his gaze out over the water, watching the waves crash close to them under the thunderstorm she had generated with her confusion.

"I would say from the strength of this storm that you miss him a great deal." He sounded frustrated. Lily took his hand. "No, that's not it at all, Elijah."

His face expressionless, he said "Well, tell me how it is Lilith. Is this other man someone I walk in the shadow of? Is that why you left me so abruptly last night?"

"Marcus has nothing at all to do with this." She was trying to make him understand and failing miserably. Lily watched his eyes harden even more just at the mention of the other man's name.

"You are right. He is not here, Lilith. And you cannot go back to him, for obvious reasons." He ran the back of a finger along her jawline. His eyes had shifted from hard anger to soft reflection in the span of a heartbeat. "I can make you forget him, Lilith."

Lily went up on her knees and took his face in gentle, loving hands. His eyes closed for a moment at the sensation of her skin against his. "I haven't thought of him a single time since I've arrived, Elijah. So I would say you've already accomplished that." He opened his eyes in surprise. Lily pointed up at the gathering storm above their heads that had yet to break loose. "That is all you." She smiled. "I suppose you could say that I find "uncertainty" uncomfortable."

She lowered her lips to his putting all that she felt into that kiss. His arms came around her, hard and strong. She made a decision that she prayed she wouldn't regret. It had been a long time for her. Illness and distraction had prevented her from becoming involved with anyone in years, but she wanted this. She wanted him.

When Elijah opened his eyes, he was somewhere else entirely. The lakeside, the waves and the storm were gone. He was sitting on a soft bed with a white feather coverlet. She was across his lap, still kissing him. He pulled away in confusion.

She laughed. "This is my home. I can't do any damage with storms here. I hope you don't mind the abruptness of my invitation." A broad smile met her laughter. "This is the best invitation I have had in centuries, Lilith."

He tugged at her hair and pressed his mouth to her neck as she lowered herself again. Any worry of regrets or fears fell away at the touch of his lips against her skin. She sighed, deep in her chest and she felt him pause and smile against her neck before continuing on with his exploration. She pushed his jacket off his shoulders, running her hands up his arms, feeling the muscles defined under his long sleeves. One moment she was wishing his shirt off, and the next it was gone. She didn't know she could do that. That might come in handy. She was the one smiling against his skin then as she pressed her lips to his shoulder. He was chuckling to himself.

Lily didn't remember laughter ever being something she had found before in the bedroom with anyone. She liked it very much.

"That is not exactly fair, Lilith." She still wore her dress and decided he was right. Rather than just will it away, she went up on her knees and took the hem with both hands. She pulled it slowly over her head. She wore very little underneath, her own little secret. But it wasn't a secret anymore. His hands came up, running along her ribcage on either side, leaving a trail of gooseflesh wherever he went. She gasped aloud at the sensation.

_He rolled her onto her back then, removing the remainder of her clothes, and his as well, with swift hands. The sounds she made were more than he could handle. He could wait no longer. Elijah kissed her again, made sure she was ready for him, and sank into heaven in a few deft movements. Her eyes widened, her mouth making a small "O" of surprise as she wrapped her legs around him reflexively. She even surprised him when she stopped once and adjusted his hips to just the right position for her pleasure before driving him on. Never had he appreciated an assertive woman as much as he did in that moment._

_He could stay right here forever. And forever was a long time for him._

Lily was wandering around her little place with a smile on her face. She couldn't seem to stop smiling. She had taken Elijah back to the lake earlier kissing him soundly. He said that he had something he had committed to doing and then he was gone. She privately hoped it wasn't something for the dreaded Klaus, because he was just trouble. Either way, Elijah could handle himself; that was for sure.

She felt the jangle in her chest and found that Damon was calling her. She found him in his den again. He had a drink in his hand, but he wasn't drinking it.

"What's happened?" She perched herself on the arm of his chair.

"You were wrong." His eyes were hard, angry and flat as he looked at her.

"Wrong? Wrong about what?" She forced him to look at her when he would've looked away.

"She hates me, Lily. She just told me so." His voice broke halfway through the statement.

Fury lit a fuse in Lily's chest. "Listen. You wait right here, and don't do anything stupid, alright. Can you handle that?" Damon nodded, but his heart wasn't in it.

Lily stood inside Elena's bedroom, leaned against a far corner when the girl came into her room and closed the door. She turned and saw Lily there and gasped out loud.

Reading her thoughts, Lily said "I don't require an invitation. I'm the one that gave you this house, Elena, along with everything in it."

The girl just looked at her before sinking into the window seat quietly.

"I don't usually intercede directly in lives around here but…"

"Then why start now?" Elena was looking back at her with one brow up. Snappy girl. Lily could respect that.

Lily forced a laugh. "You have a very good point. I'll make sure he doesn't even look at you again. I happen to know a certain redhead that would suit him just fine." She threw her hands in the air in disgust, ready to leave, and totally bluffing.

Elena stopped her. "Wait!" She had stood, lunged even, trying to stop Lily from leaving and making good on that threat.

Lily stopped and settled back against the corner, crossing her arms. "Well, you don't want him. Would you just prefer he be miserable? Is that it? Has he hurt you so much?"

Elena's eyes filled as Lily fired questions at her until tears were running down her olive cheeks. Lily couldn't stand it and went to wrap her arms around the girl.

Lily wiped tears away as Elena calmed. "I don't understand. You love him. I know you do."

Elena's eyes filled again. "He's just so…."

"Overwhelming?"

Elena nodded. The girl was just afraid of her own heart. Just as Lily had been.

"Love is like that, Elena. It's not him you're afraid of. It's you." Elena nodded again and continued to cry. "This one's just harder than it was when you fell for Stefan, because it means more."

When the storm had settled, Lily took Elena's hand, looking earnestly into her eyes. "What would you be feeling if he had told you he hated you and made you believe it?" Elena's eyes went wide as she realized that Lily already knew what she had just done. Then she did imagine how much that would hurt coming from him.

"You've crippled him, Elena. You've got to make it right. And only the truth will do that now. And it has to come from you."


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

"I can't….." Elena choked on the words. "I can't just tell him that I….." Her throat seemed to close on the words.

"Why is that exactly? Because he's so terrible? I think if you'll look honestly at what he's done that you object to, you'll see that it was all for you or because of you. Some of it was misguided, some of it was just down right stupid, but who's not stupid in love, Elena?"

But the girl was shaking her head. "You don't understand."

"No, now that's where you're wrong. I understand everything. I understand that you have insisted on loving him regardless of where I would've taken you. I would redirect your path and you would wander right back to him, Elena." Lily was being studied intently by glazed brown eyes.

"You objected to him. You were afraid of him. I offered you options. You always chose him, young lady." The deer in headlights look just increased.

"We all know his sins in all of this. Let's take a look at yours because it goes both ways. You have been fickle, indecisive," Lily was ticking things off one finger at a time as if she was keeping score. "you have used him and his power and influence over and over for your own purposes, you have led him on and then, to top it all off you broke off what little you had with him over the phone while you both thought he was dying. Even I wanted to bitch slap you for that. You chose his brother over him time and time again…and through all of this, how has he responded? He's loved you anyway. What does that say about his character?"

By the time Lily was done with her list, Elena was crying again. Because every word was true and she couldn't argue with it.

Lily let her cry for a minute and then she said "I would think that someone that you love who is also willing to die for you would the answer to every girl's dream. Is it his looks? _Because he is hideous_." Elena's eyes snapped up, looking at her like she was crazy and Lily grinned. Elena smiled then too. "He's some of my best work, thank you very much. And he deserves better than to be hurting like he is right now. He has a good and tender heart, Elena. Don't break him, please. In my own way, I love him too."

Elena calmed and thought about what Lily was saying. Lily decided the final disclosure was necessary. Elena knew too much of the bad he had done. So she said "Did I mention that he saved my life?"

The girl's gaze snapped up to Lily's face in disbelief. "No joke. I owe him everything. We all do, actually, but that gets complicated. But have you heard a word about it?" Elena shook her head. "I didn't think so. That's the kind of man you love, Elena. The other stuff is just dust. He was my hero when I needed one, when I didn't think there were any heroes left."

Elena gathered herself, wiped her face and said "Do you think you could give me a ride?"

Lily smiled, her eyes whirling in joy. "I thought you'd never ask."

A heartbeat later Lily was standing outside the door to Damon's den with Elena. She whispered to her, for her ears alone. "You've broken his heart, now it's going to take baring your own. Can you handle that?" Elena nodded, bravely. She kissed the girl's forehead, imparting a little extra courage for the girl. It felt a bit like a jolt of electricity to Elena and she rubbed the spot with a grin. Elena said "He has a good friend in you." Lily shook her head. "I have a good friend in him. Now go give him his heart's desire, Elena. Please."

She stood outside the door just long enough to hear Elena's approach and the sound of her sitting on the arm of the squeaky leather chair.

Damon said "Did you come for another pound of flesh, because I'm fresh out?" His voice sounded flat and expressionless, much as it had when Lily had spoken to him last.

Elena's response was "No, I came to tell you that it was all a lie, and I'm sorry I said I hated you." Lily heard a gusty sigh from him at that, as if he had been holding his breath the entire time she had been gone. "Why the hell would you say something like that, Elena?"

"Because I'm an idiot and I was scared."

"Of me?" Damon sounded like the two words choked him.

"No, worse. Of me."

"So you're not scared anymore?"

"No, I'm still terrified. But I love you, Damon. That's stronger than my fear." Lily heard a sudden gasp from Elena and figured it was time to stop eavesdropping. She headed for the door with a smile on her face.

Around the corner she met up with Stefan. He stopped in his tracks, taking in her appearance. Her gown was gold now, her hair down around her shoulders down to her back. Her eyes were swirling silver and gold, mostly silver right now.

"What the hell?" Stefan asked, at a loss for words. He was headed for the den. He was headed for the very same den where Damon and Elena were currently very "busy".

Lily sidled up beside him and put an arm around his shoulders. "Hi Stefan. I'm Lilith. I'm the goddess your brother has been communing with recently." Stefan looked at her like she was crazy. Maybe she was. She grinned. "You don't really need anything in there, do you?" She had propelled him in the other direction as she spoke. Her voice echoed a bit as at her words, a command wrapped in a question.

He smiled sweetly in response, "There's not really anything I need in there anyway." Wow, some of this goddess stuff was easy.

Lily went looking for Elijah.

This time, she decided not to interrupt him. He and Klaus were arguing. From the looks of things, it had gotten violent somewhere along the way.

Klaus was saying "You've got to be kidding me, right? The whole world has gone to shit, you're tupping a goddess and you don't plan to use that to our advantage?" Lily easily saw into Klaus' way of thinking. His idea of the "world having gone to shit" was that Caroline was seeing Stefan and refused see him at all. That really chapped his ass. Good.

But Elijah was angry now at Klaus' language and was hitting him again. It seemed he was defending her honor. Ring side seats. Nice.

She remained unseen for a moment or two. Before she left them, she whispered into Elijah's ear for him alone, "His return was intended as a gift for you. Next time I'll just buy you a tie." Elijah tipped his head back and laughed.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Damon had moved too fast, been too rough. He was an idiot. He hadn't meant to knock the air out of Elena's lungs when he wrapped his arms around her, but he had just the same. The air had rushed out of her in a loud gasp. She had just told him she loved him and he felt like he had waited lifetimes to hear it. He was holding her close, tucking her head to his neck gently while he gave her a minute to recover, all remorse. Sometimes he forgot how fragile she was. Idiot. He had his hands in her hair, across her back, trying to sooth her and willing the air back into her lungs again while he waited what seemed like forever for her to be able to speak again.

He was saying into her ear "I love you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. My fault. Are you okay?" Finally he felt her nod against his neck.

"Did you mean it?" He didn't want to ask, but he had to. She had told him earlier that she hated him, and he hadn't questioned it. Now he needed to be sure before he let himself believe anything anymore. His tone was hopeful and disbelieving at once, but he wasn't aware of that.

The brown eyes that turned up to him were glistening with tears. He had made her cry already? How the hell had he done that? Damn it. He really was a total idiot. But she said "I love you. I have forever it seems, much longer than I wanted to admit. I have done a lot of damage for you to have to ask if I mean it though, huh?" Elena ran a hand along his jaw and he saw it then, in her eyes. He had seen glimpses of it before, but this time she didn't hide from him.

He stopped and kissed each of her eyelids for telling him beyond a shadow of a doubt what he so desperately needed to know. Carefully and tenderly he pressed his lips to hers feeling the same jolt he always did at the contact, but he lingered now tasting her, savoring the scent of the kick of adrenaline that hit her bloodstream, the increase in her pulse and breathing, the sound she made in the back of her throat and the feel of her hands wrapping around his neck to pull him closer. She wanted him. Him. She loved him. Him. Lifetimes. He had waited lifetimes to feel this way, with this woman. And she was worth every day and every year that he had been forced to wait.

Ric was pissed. He'd been sitting at this bar for the better part of half an hour waiting for Damon to join him. He should've known better than to rely on a vampire to keep his word. He grinned at the direction of his thoughts. Maybe he should rethink his prejudices now, considering he had joined the fanged population himself recently. It was amazing how many glasses of whiskey a guy could down while he was being stood up by another guy.

Alcohol didn't have quite the same kick it had when he was human. He really had to work to feel anything now. On the other hand, as a vampire, he seemed to feel everything. It had all come crashing in on him after Lily came looking for him. The vampire senses weren't something he had stopped to adjust to while he was wrapped up in that stupid spell that nearly drove him crazy. Now, with time to explore, he was seeing the whole world differently. Some of what he saw was good, some of it horrifying. The horrifying parts were dulled with alcohol, just as they had been when he was human. The difference was that it took a couple of quarts now, rather than a couple of glasses. He had always taken his drinking seriously, now he just did that in more ways than one.

The bartender, a little woman with black hair braided into pigtails down over both her shoulders grinned at him, asking if he wanted another. She must be new…..of course he wanted another. He really just needed the damned bottle, but he didn't ask.

He caught the scent of another person settling into the seat next to him, but ignored it. The little bartender approached to take the newcomer's order. He heard a female voice, childlike and young sounding order two tequila shots. His head whipped around in surprise. The small voice came from a young woman that couldn't be more than eighteen if she was a day. She had porcelain skin with a sprinkle of freckles across her nose. She had red hair, very red hair and it was smooth and shined in the neon light from behind the bar reaching down her back nearly to her waist. At his movement, she looked up at him, meeting his inquisitive gaze with mossy green eyes.

Without a word, she reached into her pocket and held up her ID for him to look at, like it was a badge or something. His eyes fell to the birthdate and his mouth dropped open that she was thirty. He blinked in surprise. Recovering, he said "I'm not the bar police, lady."

"No, but I could see you were about to call them in. I'm used to it." It was her voice maybe, which made her seem so young. It sounded so small and childlike. But the smooth pale skin and doll like features probably did contribute. She was beautiful.

When her shots arrived, she downed one, gasped a second, and then downed the other. He was duly impressed. He was even more surprised when she ordered two more.

"Rough day?" Ric couldn't help but ask.

"You have no idea." She grimaced, in remembered frustration it seemed, and toyed with the salt while she waited.

He motioned the bartender for two of what she was having and leaned back on his stool to look at her. "What could be so bad that it requires four tequila shots?"

The woman laughed. "Hell, I'm just getting started." He waited for her answer and she shrugged. "Imagine travelling four hundred miles to meet with someone, only to find that they are out of town."

"Well, yeah, that would suck."

"Exactly."

Four shots of tequila were split between the two of them then on the bar, but they didn't notice. The bartender moved away, unnoticed as well.

Ric held out his hand and introduced himself. The woman took his hand to shake it and gasped aloud at the contact. "You're a….." She didn't finish the sentence.

She knew. Just like that. He could see the understanding dawning in her eyes, so why deny it? "Yeah, I get that a lot. It's a damned epidemic around here." There was only one way she would know just by touching him. She was a witch.

He expected her to move away, but she stopped and downed one of the shots that had ended up in front of her. He had to ask "So that doesn't scare you?"

"Not as long as you're drinking that and nothing else." She pointed to the shots and actually smiled at him.

"I'm Leah, by the way."

"Why wouldn't you be afraid, Leah?" She grinned conspiratorially. "That's easy. I could toast you if I had to." She held her palm low between the two of them and he watched flame lick across it, almost lovingly, before she closed her hand. A fire element witch. Ouch.

"How about we agree that I won't bite and you won't toast?" He grinned as he downed the second shot.

"Sounds fair to me, Ric. You're too cute to toast anyway. Or maybe that's the tequila talking."

At the other end of the bar, the bartender with the black braids was grinning like a fool to herself, her silver and gold eyes whirling before she faded away.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Elijah awoke slowly to a strange sensation. Warmth was spread across his entire right side and was stretched across his chest. He recognized her scent before he opened his eyes. She was the fragrance of fresh rain and lightning. He could swear he went to bed alone, but here she was tucked under his right arm, one hand splayed across his heart. Elijah opened his eyes to a black curly hair right up under his nose. Waking alone was something that was just part of his life. Over the centuries, even when he was involved with someone, he never trusted anyone enough to sleep next to them. This was another novelty. He liked it, very much.

Lily had found him sleeping and watched him struggle with something in a dream. She had stood there for several minutes until she couldn't stand it any longer and had laid a hand on him to comfort him, hoping not to wake him. In his sleep, he had pulled her down next to him and settled in again peacefully. So Lily stayed, and it was sweet and wonderful. Her last thought before she fell asleep herself was that hopefully she would wake again and be gone before he opened his eyes.

Her eyes opened to the sensation of a piece of her hair being moved. Elijah was gently twirling a curl around his finger. Realizing where she was and what she had done, Lily was immediately embarrassed. She started to pull away thinking only of escape, but one arm came around her, preventing her retreat.

Left with no options, she spoke with her face tucked into his bare and partially sheet covered chest. "I'm sorry I invaded your privacy. I came looking for you and found you asleep. You were restless and dreaming. I ended up here and you calmed. I meant to be gone before you woke."

"There is no harm done." He tilted her face up to look at him. "I am glad you stayed." Then he kissed her, drawing her up his chest with both hands and sinking one of those hands into the thick, dark curls to cup her neck. With the other hand he skimmed her jawline and her cheek, still hot with embarrassment. "You are welcome in my bed any time."

Lily sat at the back of the room. She was getting better all the time at adjusting her appearance. She had light brown, short hair, wore glasses and jeans. She could adjust any part of her outward appearance at will now allowing her to move, unnoticed, among others. Tonight, she was gathering information.

Klaus was at the head of the room, pacing before a group of some thirty witches, a mixture of both men and women. He was angry. He wanted answers and these people had none.

"I want to know who she is, what her weaknesses are, how she can be contained, how her power can be harnessed!" He was furious, having expected more of this group.

One man stood, representing them all. "But we have no records of her activity, not as an individual in a corporeal body, anyway. It is said that she is the source of all power, that she wrote the spells we use, but we don't have anything recorded that includes her name or any real details about her."

"Then we need to know how to destroy that corporeal body. If I can't use her, I want rid of her, damn it!" He slammed a single fist down on the table he was standing over and it shuddered. Some of the witches in the room shuddered too.

"Go!" He yelled when his demand was met with silence. "Go and find out what I need to know. I've lost patience with all of you." He slashed a hand through the air, furious. He sank onto a stool near the table while the witches skittered out of the room. He looked discouraged. Lily's heart shifted in her chest. His animosity and turmoil were her fault.

She stayed in her seat as the others filed out of the room, getting a few looks from others as they passed that said she must be crazy. But she waited. When the room was empty and the door closed, aside from Klaus, still brooding at the front of the room, she shifted and appeared again as herself. Her dress now reflected light like mother of pearl.

She waited for him to look up and when he did, he froze. She still sat where she was, watching. She saw something flicker in his eyes, surprise and …..fear maybe. Lily was ashamed.

"It doesn't have to be this way, Niklaus. You and I have never been enemies before now. Our association goes back to your very beginnings. I have walked every step with you."

His expression melted from surprise to fury at her words. "And you've hated me every step of the way." His eyes had narrowed and his jaw was set.

Lily stood then and retrieved a stool like the one he was sitting on. She pulled it up next to him and sat on it, facing him.

"Have you ever noticed how a wound heals in a human, Klaus?" He looked at her strangely, but shrugged. "The wounds on the surface heal the fastest, exposed best to the air, and clean water, soap, antiseptic. But if a wound is deep, it can fester, spreading poison and eating away at flesh as it grows." Lily knew that Klaus had lost people to just the type of wound she was referring. He nodded at her description, remembering. "The ones that fester are the worst, and if they are ever to heal, they must be opened again, cleaned out, treated and given that open air to heal again."

"You opened a wound at our first meeting, Klaus. This is why I was so brutal, so angry."

Lily met his eyes earnestly. "You sent them out to find out about me. I will tell you something that no one else knows. My mother abandoned me in a marketplace. I was around two. I became a homeless street kid. A guttersnipe." His eyes widened at her words. She shrugged and swallowed. Lily had been found later by a policeman and ended up in foster care, but she had read her own file. She knew the truth.

"I regret my anger and the things I said. Those things weren't true. I love you, just as I love all of my creations. You are each of you bits and pieces of me."

He looked away, his mouth set in a firm line.

"This path you've set upon because of my anger will not end well for you. This is why I decided we should talk. I wanted for you to know that I regret. This war you want to wage with me will not get you what you want."

He swung around to look at her then, angry. "And I suppose you could tell me what it is that I want?"

"Of course. You want Caroline. But more than anything you want not be alone anymore. You want not to have to force others to be close to you. You want love."

He went very still, searching her face in surprise. She knew she was exactly right. "I know all that is in your heart, Klaus. All of it." He looked away again, but the anger had faded away.

So Lily continued, "I should tell you that this is not a Greek myth. I am not "a goddess"; I am "the goddess". There aren't any others. There is just me. The opposite of me is chaos. The forward motion of your life stops if something happens to me. No changes, nothing new, forever reliving the past. So to end me would be the end you as well. And that would only be if you could defeat me." She shrugged, unafraid.

"Your witches won't find any record of me because I wrote those records." A ghost of a smile played across her face. "I left myself out. I never planned to come here. I would have always been just "the goddess" and nothing more, but plans change."

She opened her hands to him between the two of them. "Niklaus, I see no value in fighting with you. There is nothing to gain from bloodshed. Personally, I have seen enough death to last me lifetimes."

She stood and came close to him. Lily's eyes swirled with love for him and regret. She loved Klaus too; it had just taken time for her to remember that. When her anger faded, she saw him again. He had hurt just as Elijah had. Klaus believed that he could answer his needs with force, even after all this time and all of the failure. She wanted for him to live long enough to learn that lesson and grow. She wanted him to find love; to help him find it, if he would allow it. What she didn't want was to be forced to end his life. And because she maintained balance, she had that option.

Lily framed his face in her hands and kissed his forehead tenderly before he could move away or stop her, which was saying something. Tenderness wasn't something he had tasted often and she believed he was worth the effort. "I really am sorry. You decide now how this will go."


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

_Lilith was in his arms, where she belonged. Her black hair was spread across his pillow in lovely disarray. They had just made love and Elijah was still lying half across her. She was running her hands along his back, trailing her fingers up and down in a rhythm of ardor that would have his body stirring again in a few moments if she did not stop soon. But the feeling was warm, and sweet and wonderful. He fought his body's urge to respond to her caresses; the urge for his spine to arch under her hands, for his muscles to knot and ripple, knowing it would start them again down the path they had just traveled together so beautifully. He wanted to enjoy this part of their tender loving as much as he had already enjoyed the other._

_Lilith was volatile and yet infinitely warm and kind. She occupied his thoughts now in ways he could not have anticipated when they first met. He looked up at the stars at night now and thought of her, of the pattern of them, wondering if she had scattered them purposely, or patterned them after what she saw in her own world. He even wondered if there were hidden messages there. He saw her in everything now, even the swirling patterns on his fingertips, wondering if people in her world had the same patterns, or if this was something she had initiated here as she had the monsters and the magic. Imagining a world without magic was unfathomable for Elijah, but she insisted that was where she came from. No magic at all. He could only think that it must have been a terribly dry, terribly sad place._

_ She was all he had never known he needed. She knew and understood things he did not, and yet she did not take the role of being superior, or become a teacher. She simply was. She loved others in ways he could not begin to understand. Then she could become a force of vengeance in a single heartbeat. She could be both a tender loving creator and violent judge at once. She seemed to be most happy when those she loved were at peace. The other time she seemed most happy was when they were right here, together._

_ They talked about many things, sharing where neither of them would have shared with someone else. They understood one another. There was a foundation of trust between them that had come to mean a great deal to Elijah. She was too honest, too forthright to lie. She would tell him the truth, even if she was embarrassed by it. The only thing she would not discuss was the man she had named Marcus from her own world. She would shut down before he could finish the first sentence if he dared to speak that name. He had learned to leave it alone, but it troubled him. She knew about his other liaisons, because ultimately she had been there, even orchestrating them. So he had no secrets for a change, but in this one area she was unable or unwilling to share. Elijah told himself that it would just take time for her to trust him with whatever pain lived there. He could only hope that it did not mean that she still loved the other man._

_ Elijah found that uncertainty was uncomfortable for him as well._

Lily felt the jangle in her chest that indicated Damon was calling. It was late, she was tired and when she listened closely, she found herself a little annoyed with him.

She appeared in his den, striking up the flames on the fire in the hearth and the unlit candles around the room in her irritation. Even the electric lights flickered as she appeared. Damon and Ric were drinking again, as usual. This time they weren't alone. But Lily didn't care. She stalked right over to Damon and thumped him on the forehead hard with her thumb and forefinger.

"Owwww, Lily. What the hell?" He was laughing and grumbling, holding his head with one hand and a glass of whiskey with the other.

"I'm not a damned parlor trick to impress your friends, Dipshit."

The room burst into laughter. Lily was rolling her eyes and having a hard time staying angry when he grinned that way.

Elena and Leah were also there. The four of them had dinner together and had been talking and drinking afterwards.

"I was just kidding about that, Lily, I swear." He was laughing. "Leah was eager to meet you."

Leah was the only one who wasn't laughing. She was sitting quietly beside Ric with an expression of wonder on her small, doll like face as she took in the scene, her eyes sweeping Lily from head to toe. Lily was unaware that small shafts of golden light burst around her when she moved.

Lily's gown was golden tonight and the firelight reflected here and there. Her eyes swirled in her irritation, the dual silver and gold as always. Her hair down, around her waist and loose sprinkled with golden sparkles like the rest of her already was. She wore no shoes. She had found she didn't like shoes much.

"Leah. It's nice to finally meet you." Lily approached, stopping several feet away. She knew now that the power she carried was an irritant for some witches causing fluctuations in their control.

Leah's small voice filled the room. "I didn't believe them."

Lily smiled. "That was probably wise coming from these two." She smiled indulgently at both Ric and Damon. "But this part is true."

"You're the reason I came here. I heard through the network that Bonnie Bennett had met you and so I came, but she wasn't here."

"I know." Lily smiled.

"I wanted to serve you." Leah announced it on a sigh. Lily stepped in close then, touching her hand lightly. "You already do, honey. And beautifully. You make me very proud."

"No, I meant in your temple."

Lily smiled and shook her head. "You would have to die to do that, and I have much for you to do before then. So not yet, but one day you will when your work here is done. Will that satisfy you, Leah?" The woman nodded enthusiastically, and smiled, swallowing several times. Her lovely green eyes had filled with tears. "I just didn't think this would ever actually happen."

"I drew you here. And you listened. You did well. Not everyone is so obedient." Lily touched the woman's cheek and sat beside her on the couch.

Lily realized then that the entire room was watching the entire exchange and Leah was getting emotional. She smiled at the room at large and waved a dismissive hand. "Carry on people. Leah and I have talking to do."

The others went back to drinking and talking as Lily led Leah toward the back of the room so they could talk privately. After a few minutes, Lily was able to calm the other woman and bring her some measure of peace. The idea of followers was new to Lily, but she could see that this was something that was going to happen among the witches. She would need to consider how to handle this. Unlike the Greek gods of myth, she didn't require worship for her power, so these people would be her opportunity to connect with them, to help them, nothing more.

One primary question Leah had was about vampires in general. It was common among witches to consider all vampires enemies. This was something that had happened over time when more controlling and malicious vampires were the problem. Lily wanted to change that, to set aside prejudices and base judgment on an individual, rather than a group. Leah could see that Lilith, which is what Lily suggested Leah call her, favored vampires as well as witches. Racism in any form was not something she would ever condone. Being the goddess just got even more complicated.

Damon pulled her aside before she prepared to go home. "Elena said that the two of you have an understanding." It wasn't phrased as a question, but he clearly wasn't comfortable and wanted details. He had concerns about what the two of them would have to talk about, evidently.

"Yes, that's right." When she didn't elaborate, his eyes narrowed in frustration, but she only grinned.

"Lily!" It was a plea and a complaint at once. She only laughed. "Stop worrying, Damon. Call it a mutual admiration society. We found we had a love for you in common." She kissed his cheek lightly and faded away.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

_She was over him, moving. Their hands were clasped and she was beautiful in the light. Their eyes met and there was feeling reflected at him that Elijah could not name with certainty. She spoke words of love to everyone around her easily; everyone but him. Only that first day in her apartment had she used those words with him. Since then he had not heard it from her, only seen something like it, there in her eyes. Or at least that is what he hoped was there, looking back at him. Elijah rose to meet her, crying out as he did. Her name was torn from his chest. _

_ And then she went still, frozen._

_ "Lilith, what is it?"_

_ Her eyes had clouded. When she looked at him again, he saw anger boiling in the swirling depths of her newly silver eyes. "Someone passed through the veil. I have to go."_

_ "The veil to your world?"_

_ "Yes." This was not going to go well. "Meet me there." She faded away._

The veil opening was in a clearing and stood between two ancient oak trees on the edge of town. The branches had woven together over time and created what almost looked like a door. Considering how isolated the doorway was, it was a miracle in itself that Damon had ever even found the place in the beginning. Lily had no real explanation for why he would have heard her voice that day, or the source of the opening between their two worlds. She only knew for sure that this pathway had saved her life, so she had not questioned, and she had not addressed the portal. Nostalgia had stopped her. She felt the footsteps of those who had passed through now like a vibration in her soul. She felt sure that this was a disaster.

She couldn't see who it was that had crossed the barrier, but she had a good idea. And even if she couldn't cross herself, she could be ready when they returned.

At the opening, she waited. Her dress was dark gunmetal grey, mirroring her mood as she stood ready. She saw Damon first, leading the way back to Mystic Falls. She could see anger and frustration in his face and when his eyes locked with hers she saw horror and shame. She didn't waver. Lily held a longbow, arrow nocked and ready, aimed at the portal as Marcus came through next. Only her mouth opened in surprise before she firmed her jaw and settled in again for what she had to do. Then, hands rough and impatient, Klaus followed him. Marcus was nearly unrecognizable; he had been beaten so badly. Lily could smell the blood, and see it on Damon's clothes and hands. He had done the job, working over Marcus thoroughly, compelled by Klaus. This was Klaus' idea of justice. He had forced one person she loved to hurt another. The fury in Lily's heart bloomed.

Lily had expected Klaus wouldn't be capable of just letting go. She had thought his vengeance would include his brother. She had kept close to Elijah recently for just this reason. Klaus had surprised her by finding a more creative way to hurt her. But his creativity was a gift from her. She had some of her own as well.

As Klaus' eyes met hers, they widened.

Her stance was proud and tall. The longbow she held was as tall as she was, pulled strong and taut, ready to let loose the arrow that would not miss. Her right hand was drawn back, anchored beneath her jaw, one eye closed over the arrow that was aimed right at him.

"Have I mentioned my hobby, Klaus, during our heart to heart conversations?" She smiled coldly.

He pulled Marcus over to stand between them, using his body as a shield. At the sound of her voice, Marcus struggled to open one of his eyes, which were swollen shut.

"Lilith?" It seemed he recognized her voice; his own voice was slurred with pain.

Lily forced herself to ignore him, her aim adjusting as she focused right between Klaus' eyes since Marcus' body now blocked the flight path for his heart.

_Elijah appeared then behind her, witnessing what was to him a tableau of horror. Lilith had an arrow trained on Klaus, who appeared to have brought a human back with him from her own world._

"_Lilith, is that you?" The human's voice was a drop in the silence that had stretched as taut as Lilith's bowstring._

_She sighed, took a deep breath. Her eyes never wavered from Klaus, but gently Lilith said "Yes, Marcus. I'm here. Give me just a minute and I'll explain." Her voice was light and comforting, and Elijah felt she had just sunk that arrow into his own chest._

"Klaus, can you guess which ancient tree I made these arrows from?" She saw fear flicker in Klaus' eyes at her words. "I have a full quiver of them. I've been holding onto them for centuries for just such a day as this."

"If you really knew me, Lily, you would know that I don't have a forgiving heart." Klaus was reaching to grab Marcus' head and neck. He would break Marcus' neck while she watched and she couldn't stop him. Or so he thought.

From behind, he felt a hand on his shoulder. She was there, across the field, with an arrow trained on him, but now she was also beside him, sliding a single arrow in her own small hand up under his ribcage and into his heart while his own hands were waiting to kill her human lover.

"I do know, Klaus. _You_ should know that my patience ends here." The version of herself across the field flickered and disappeared as Klaus burst into flames.

_Elijah watched her Marcus topple as Klaus released him in death. Lilith caught him, wrapping her arms around him, leading his body gently to the soft ground. She sat under him, cradling his body against her chest._

"_I'm so sorry." She was whispering to the stranger._

_Elijah walked away. He could watch no more. His brother was dead and the woman he loved held her love in her arms and was speaking tender words. This was enough pain for one day._

Damon watched, silent, as Lily wrapped her arms around her Marcus. He had done this. There was nothing he could say. He expected her to sink one of those arrows into him when she stood again, but he couldn't make himself leave. He wasn't compelled to stay any longer, but his feet were rooted to the spot just the same.

Then she turned and looked up at him. "Help me, please." She was asking him to help her lift Marcus' weight from off of her so she could move. He moved fast, with gentle hands shifting the unconscious man's body off of her and lowering him again to the ground. She kneeled, as Damon watched, and pressed her hands to the broken and swollen face. Her hands glowed as they moved, healing as she went. Broken bones mended, bleeding stopped. Damon broke and Lily mended. More of the balance she insisted on, he supposed.

When she was done, the man's eyes still didn't open. She looked up then at Damon. "Are you alright?"

Damon nearly choked. She knew what he had done. He had led Klaus to her Marcus, and then beat him while the other vampire laughed. She knew it all, but she was worried about him? Confusion flickered in his crystal blue eyes.

Lily's heart fluttered at his pain. "This wasn't your fault, Damon. I know that. This was my fault, not yours." She stood and pressed a small kiss to his cheek. "There's nothing here to forgive."

He was amazed. No blame, no rejection. No arrow through his heart. He would never understand her, but he was so glad she was here and believed in him. Damon wrapped his arms around his friend in relief. He was fighting back moisture that wanted to collect behind his eyes.

Marcus opened his eyes. "Lilith, is that really you?"

She came to his side and kneeled. "Yes, Marcus. I'm here. I'm so sorry you got caught up in this. You're going to be fine now." She was trying to comfort him; sure he would be terrified over what had happened.

But he sat up and wrapped his arms around her. She was engulfed in wide shoulders and strong arms.

"God, we looked for you for months." He leaned back, pushing her hair away from her face. Warm brown eyes swept her face and she saw moisture gathering there. "You're here? You're alright?" He looked around then and spotted Damon, who was watching them with surprise. He stood and pushed Lily behind him, placing himself between her and Damon.

"Lilith, you need to run." But Lily came around him, looked into his eyes. Marcus saw then the changes, her eyes weren't green and brown anymore. They were silver and gold. Her hair was longer, curling around her. She was different. Beautiful, but different.

"He won't hurt either of us now, Marcus. He's my friend." How could she explain?

"He's a monster, Lilith."

"Yes, I know he is." She grimaced in apology to Damon and turned back to Marcus. "But he's my monster." She reached and took Marcus' hand.

"You should go now. Damon can take you back home." She turned to Damon. "Make him forget, please. All of it. Wipe any feelings for me, any worry for me, away. Will you do that?"

Damon nodded. "Whatever you want, Lily. But I think maybe you were wrong at last. You said he didn't love you back."

Marcus heard only her instructions and protested. "Lilith, come back with me. Or let me stay here with you. Please." He didn't understand much, but he had just found her again.

"It's better this way, Marcus. Go and be happy." She touched his face, speaking peace into his heart with the power she had here and watched his eyes glaze over.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

Lily stood at the portal waiting for Damon to return. He had led Marcus back to his home and needed some time to do as she had asked. She didn't want Marcus to mourn her. She hadn't expected any of that when she came here, hadn't expected anyone to miss her at all, really. Her real associations were few and far between. She supposed, even among her few friends, that she would've been long forgotten by now. None of them knew about her illness, she had wanted it that way, preferring to pretend it wasn't happening when others were around.

Elijah was in his library. His books usually brought him comfort when nothing else did. It was no help at all this time. He knew she would come eventually, if nothing else to discuss his brother, to make apologies. This was her way, and he could respect that. He also expected that she would come to tell him that they were done together. She had Marcus here with her now. He expected she might even tell him to go and be happy without her, wish him well. If she did, he might break things whether she was there to see it or not. Perhaps waiting in his library, with his precious books was a bad idea.

Lilith had warned him from the beginning that she did not know how this would end. He would not listen to her warnings by the time she said them, though. He had already loved her, would have done or said anything to have her, even for a little while.

He moved to look out the window at the night sky. The sun had set. It had been hours since his brother had fallen for the last time. Those arrows had been a surprise, even to him. She had never mentioned them. It might have been arrogant to believe she told him everything, but he had hoped that at least this thing she might have shared. But she had not. She held the key to his survival, his life, in her small hands the same way she did everyone else here. Her precious balance had to be maintained above all.

She surprised him by appearing suddenly and pressing against his back, wrapping her arms around his chest from behind. He had not heard her, or noticed her scent. The angry, broken part of him half expected her to be holding one of those arrows to sink into his chest as well when her arms came around him. But he didn't actually believe she would do that, not really.

"I'm sorry, Elijah." He stiffened, pulled away. He could tell from her tone that she meant she was sorry about Klaus. He expected she would be saying goodbye to him too, but at least she had not gotten there yet.

"He forced your hand, Lilith. I saw. I know." He swallowed and ran a hand over his face before he turned on her and the angry words he had been holding in spewed out of him. He sounded bitter even to his own ears. "I have to ask if you will keep the rest of those arrows now in the event that I get out of hand. Are they available for when I outlive my usefulness?"

Lily understood he felt betrayed that she hadn't told him about the arrows. They would have come in handy long before now, she supposed. They had been her ace in the hole for so long that she had just never considered mentioning them. But she would never in a million years use them against him. How could he think such a thing?

She laid two leather quivers on his desk. "You will find eleven in one and twelve in the other. The one I used on Klaus burnt with him. This is all there are. Consider them a gift."

He walked over and took one of the arrows in his hands, confused. His anger had drained away just that quickly. "I do not understand, Lilith. I am the last of us left, but there would be no way to kill me without them. What would you do if I one day I laid my humanity aside and started mowing through your people? This makes no sense at all." He sank into the chair behind his desk, still holding the deadly arrow.

Lilith came and sat on the desk next to him. "I would never be able to do to you what I did to Klaus today, Elijah. So what's the point of holding onto them? Do whatever you please, burn them, break them, keep them. I don't care."

His head came up at her words, his study of the arrow done. She was searching his face, her silver eyes liquid in the light. "Why, Lilith? Help me understand." Balance was everything to her. Always and forever to be certain that all things could come to a final end if it was needed. "A yin for a yang", as she liked to put it. She was setting that possibility aside for him by giving him this gift.

Small shoulders shrugged. "I am finding that I laid the foundations for this place with my words, my books, Elijah. But the reality of it is far more than I was ever able to commit to prose. There are intricacies I don't always see coming. I speak words and make things happen without knowing all of the ripples that will result. This place is wonderful and terrible for me. I am in control, and yet not in control at all. I am surprised every day."

His face must have illustrated his confusion because she groaned in frustration. "You don't understand do you?" Elijah shook his head.

"Did you know that Damon raises roses in his garden? The place is absolutely overflowing with them, in every color you could imagine. I thought, at first that he just had a very gifted gardener, but he doesn't use a gardener. He said he doesn't want some meat fisted fool messing with his things. He'd rather do it himself. I never wrote that, Elijah."

"Ric loves large puzzles. He spent years doing them with his grandparents, so now he keeps one going all the time at his apartment on the kitchen table. He said it reminds him of them, makes him feel at home. Again, I didn't write that."

"Elena's collection of Teddy bears in her room in every imaginable color, proudly displayed when she's a grown woman now. I didn't write that either. Or your love of your books, the fact that you retreat to them when you're hurting or angry; I never wrote that either, Elijah. All of you, all of this is beyond what I will ever be able to completely grasp or control."

"I have even caught myself in the mess with my own words. So really, pretending I'm in control of anything at all is a sham at this point. So why hang onto those arrows now and pretend I could ever use them against you no matter what you do. That will never happen. It would all be a lie." She had stood while she spoke and was pacing, throwing her hands into the air in frustration.

"Lilith? What do you mean that you have caught yourself?"

She stopped pacing to look up at him. She came and sat back on the desk again. "Do you remember the promise I made you in my apartment when you came to my world?"

"You said that you could offer me someone who would love me without condition. You promised me someone that I could love too, that would not care where I had been, all that I had done, and just loved me." He was nearly quoting. He remembered everything she had ever said to him.

"That is how I caught myself, Elijah." Her expression said she had explained everything, but he still did not understand.

She read his face. "Who else but me would know all you have done? I was talking about myself, Elijah and sealing my fate. I already loved you then and probably always did. When I spoke those words to you, I made it happen, and I was trapped by my own promise. I'm in love with you. How do you not know this?"

"But your Marcus…." His voice came out as a whisper.

She shook her head. "He's gone. I sealed the portal shut after Damon returned him to his apartment. Damon wiped me from his memory. There really is not anyone I want but you. It was part of the promise I made to you and it stands true."

He stood fast enough to send her hair whipping around in the breeze created by his speed. He had his arms around her again and her face was tucked against his chest.

"You never said anything. You used those words easily with everyone but me." She felt the words vibrate from his chest. She had hurt him with her fear.

"They meant more with you. I was afraid."

"I love you, Lilith." She went still against his chest and the words vibrated from deep within him, across her cheek and settled somewhere around her own chest lighting a path of joy as they traveled.

Wrapping her arms around him, she spoke them again to him, against his sternum. Elijah's chest expanded as she felt the deep breath he took at her words and the resulting sigh of relief.

**Author's Note: **

**Thanks for reading, guys. I hope you enjoyed the reading as much as I enjoyed the writing. Writing these fan fics is fun for me when I hit a rough spot while working on my novel, since the character work here is already done so beautifully. **

**Can anyone tell I have a HUGE soft spot for Elijah? SIGH**

**Incidentally, if you're a Klaus fan and you've stuck with me this long, you should know that I wish things could've gone differently for him. He makes for a very good bad boy and I miss him already. But he insisted he wasn't forgiving and wouldn't just let go after what Lily did to him…..so there you have it.**


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